Why isn't a banana called a "yellow"?
After all, an orange is called an "orange".
%
Why do we read left-to-right, but turn pages right-to-left?
%
Why are they called hamburgers, if there's no ham?
And hamsters! What about hamsters?
%
Why doesn't my left knee ache like the right?
They're both the same age.
%
Why is a football field measured in yards?
%
Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot them?
%
Why is there so much pressure to spend Independence Day with other people?
%
Why is there an expiration date on sour cream?
%
Why is it spelled camouflage and not &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp;.?
%
Why am I the only naked person at this gender reveal party?
%
Why is it so hot and what am I doing in this hand basket?
%
Why does it take 100 million sperm to fertilize one egg?
Because they won't stop to ask directions.
%
Why isn't a flat moon conspiracy more popular,
since we always see the same face?
%
Why don't you find waiters in waiting rooms?
%
Why do they call it a strike when you <u>don't</u> hit the ball?
%
Why is dyslexia so awkward to spell,
and why can't I remember aphasia when I want to?
%
Why would anyone go to the trouble to write a novel when you can just go out and buy one?
%
Why do things that happen to stupid people keep happening to me?
%
Why are they still inventing new vegetables?
%
Why do meteorites always land in craters?
%
Why did ancient people bury their cities?
%
Why do they bother with 7-day weather forecasts?
They have enough trouble just with tomorrow.
%
Why is bra singular and panties plural?
%
Why do birds fly south for the winter?&ensp;Because it's too far to walk.
%
Why do I feel the need to question everything?
%
Why do we call them olives and not Greece's Pieces.
%
Why is no one ever just the right amount of whelmed?
%
Why do blind people walk their dogs so much?
%
Why do farts smell? &ensp;So deaf people can enjoy them too.
%
Why do smoke alarm batteries only die in the middle of the night?
%
Why do we wash bath towels?
%
Why have I never seen a left-handed microwave oven?
%
Why does it take 6 weeks to lose 5 pounds,
and only 1 day to gain it all back?
%
Why would I have a need for a voyage of self-discovery?
I can just Google myself.
%
Why aren't iPhone chargers called Apple Juice?!
%
Why would Roquefort Cheese have an expiration date?
%
Why is the alphabet in that order?&ensp;Is it because of that song?
%
Why do you answer every question with a question?
Oh? You got a problem with that?
%
Why do mountain climbers rope themselves together?
To prevent the sensible ones from going home.
%
Why should I go to Mike's funeral?
He's not coming to mine!
%
Why do we want intelligent devices when there are so many stupid users?
%
Why does a man's knees get weak when a woman wears leather clothing?
Because she smells like a new truck.
%
Why won't sharks attack lawyers? Professional courtesy.
%
Why do women refuse to admit their age, and men refuse to act theirs?
%
Why, oh why, don't people poof read their jokes?
%
Why do we want intelligent terminals when there are so many stupid users?
%
Why can't medications have <u>positive</u> side effects?
%
Why are we advised to question everything?
%
Why are there pop tarts but no mom tarts?
%
Why do chicken coops have two doors?
Because if they had four, they would be chicken sedans.
%
Why does "fat chance" and "slim chance" mean the same?
%
Why does the Zoom company have offices?
%
Why would they make a tube of BenGay look exactly like a tube of toothpaste?!
%
Why is there always enough asphalt to make speed bumps,
but not enough to fill potholes?
%
Why is it old age always catches up with you, but never passes you by?
%
Why childbirth is called delivery?
Shouldn't it be called takeout instead?
%
Why is it that people with raisin brains have watermelon mouths?
%
Why can't she be at a loss for words when we're lost?
%
Why do dentists call'em "X-rays", when they should call'em "tooth pics".
%
Why did the Vegan cross the road?
To tell someone else they are Vegan.
%
Why do I always sleep at my desk?
Silly question. All the others are occupied.
%
Why are divorces so expensive? Because they are worth it!
%
Why is my lemonade made from artificial flavor,
and my furniture polish is made with real lemons?
%
Why is it called a 'tuna fish sandwich'?
Nobody ever says 'chicken bird sandwich'.
%
Why are they called waiters if I do all the waiting.
%
Why do women always make me feel like I walked into the middle of a movie?
%
Why do blurry people ask me if I'm drunk?
%
Why does Saturday coffee taste so much better than rest-of-the-week coffee?
%
Why aren't financial advisors as wealthy as they claim they'll make you?
%
Why does the radio stop to tell you that they play non-stop music?
%
Why do Americans choose from just two people for President and fifty for Miss America?
%
Why is "backyard" one word, and "front yard" two?
%
Why do socks and underwear come in resealable bags, but potato chips don't?
%
Why do they call it a "Near Miss". Wouldn't it really be a Near Hit?
%
Why do they ask me to "Press 1 For English",
and then connect me to someone who can't speak it?
%
Why is it when you're dieting that every TV program shows people eating?
%
Why do blurry people always ask me if I'm drunk?
%
Why do they put diarrhea medication on the bottom shelf at the pharmacy?
%
Why I was so eager to begin adulting?
%
Why is it so difficult to ask questions when you're painfully shy?
Just asking for a friend.
%
Why doesn't the tooth fairy just dig up dead people to get teeth?
%
Why does it seem like there are twice as many Mondays as Fridays?
%
Why do you need a pilot's license?
What're they gonna do, pull you over?
%
Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
%
Why does the sun lighten our hair, but darken our skin?
%
Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
%
Why is a boxing ring square?
%
Why is it called lipstick if you can still move your lips?
%
Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?
%
Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?
%
Why is it that rain drops but snow falls?
%
Why is it that when you drive up to the ATM,
you turn down the volume on the radio?
%
Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor,
and dish washing liquid made with real lemons?
%
Why is the third hand on the watch called a second hand?
%
Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
%
Why is the word dictionary in the dictionary?
%
Why isn't there a special name for the tops of your feet?
%
Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
%
Would you need a silencer if you are going to shoot a mime?
%
Does a fish get cramps after eating?
%
Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?
%
How can someone "draw a blank"?
%
How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work in the mornings?
%
If 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the doors?
%
If 75% of all accidents happen within 5 miles of home, why not move 10 miles away?
%
If a cow laughed real hard, would milk come out her nose?
%
If nothing ever sticks to TEFLON, how do they make TEFLON stick to the pan?
%
If pro is the opposite of con, is progress the opposite of congress?
%
If someone invented instant water, what would they mix it with?
%
If you can't drink and drive, why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor, and why do bars have parking lots?
%
If your finger is touching the rearview mirror that says "objects in mirror are closer than they appear", how can that be possible?
%
If you keep trying to prove Murphy's Law, will something keep going wrong?
%
If you tied buttered toast to the back of a cat and dropped it from a tall building what would happen?
%
If you're in a vehicle going the speed of light, what happens when you turn on the headlights?
%
Shouldn't there be a shorter word for "monosyllabic"?
%
What does Geronimo say when he jumps out of a plane?
%
What is another word for "thesaurus"?
%
When they ship Styrofoam, what do they pack it in?
%
Why are cigarettes sold in gas stations when smoking is prohibited there?
%
Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes?
%
Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?
%
Why are they called 'stands' when they're made for sitting?
%
Why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
%
Why do tugboats push their barges?
%
Why do fat chance and slim chance mean the same thing?
%
Why do they call them "apartments" when they are all stuck together?
%
Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of the drive-up ATM?
%
Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways?
%
Why do we sing 'Take me out to the ball game', when we are already there?
%
Why does "cleave" mean both split apart and stick together?
%
Why does "slow down" and "slow up" mean the same thing?
%
Why does an alarm clock "go off" when it begins ringing?
%
Why does flammable and inflammable mean the same thing?
%
Why does your nose run and your feet smell?
%
Why doesn't "onomatopoeia" sound like what it is?
%
Why is it called a "building" when it is already built?
%
Why is it called a TV "set" when you only get one?
%
Why is it so hard to remember how to spell mnemonic?
%
Why is it that when you transport something by car,it's called a shipment,
but when you transport something by ship, it's called cargo?
%
Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address,
you';; turn down the volume on the radio?
%
Why is it when two planes almost hit each other it is called a "near miss"?
Shouldn't it be called a "near hit"?
%
Why is it, whether you sit up or sit down, the result is the same?
%
Why is the word "abbreviate" so long?
%
Why is there an expiration date on SOUR cream?
%
Why is there only ONE Monopolies Commission?
%
Why isn't "palindrome" spelled the same way backwards?
%
Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?
%
You know how most packages say "Open here"?
What's the protocol if it said, "Open elsewhere"?
%
You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes,
why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance?
%
Why has the internet evolved from smart people working with dumb terminals into dumb people working with smart terminals.
%
Why does the other side of the street cross the street when I do?
%
What goes through a bird's mind when he passes through a fireworks display?
%
How is it possible to be seated on a standing committee?
%
What year did Jesus think it was?
%
What exactly is "viewer discretion"?
If viewers had any discretion, most TV shows would not be on the air.
%
What exactly is "midair"?
Is there some other part of the air besides the "mid" part?
%
How is it one careless match can start a forest fire,
but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?
%
If WalMart is lowering prices every day, why isn't anything in the store free yet?
%
Why are there 5 syllables in the word "monosyllabic"?
%
Why do we bake cookies and cook bacon?
%
Why is a bra singular and panties plural?
%
Why is "incorrectly" the only word that, when spelled right, is still spelled incorrectly.
%
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
%
Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?
%
Where do they get the seeds to plant seedless watermelons?
%
Why is the day that you do laundry, cook, clean, iron and so on, called a day off?
%
If you're not supposed to eat at night, why is there a light bulb in the refrigerator?
%
Why do they call it a hot water heater when it actually heats cold water?
%
Why is a group of squids not called a SQUAD?
%
Why is it spelled "camouflage" and not "&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp;."?
%
Why hasn't Cap'n Crunch been promoted?
It's been over sixty years now.
%
Why does Filipino start with an F and Philippines start with Ph?
%
Why weren't "dentures" called "substitooths", instead?
%
Why can't we just spell it "brockly?
%