Found 2 large bumps on my mobile's battery and had them tested.
One came back positive. Google says it’s terminal. l was shocked.
%
A resistor walks into a bar on his ohm.
%
Mr Ohm married Mrs Ohm because he couldn't resistor.
%
Nothing is made in the U.S. anymore. My new SW receiver says, "BUILT IN ANTENNA".
I don't even know where that is!  Is it in the DXCC list?
%
Regretted ever learning Morse Code,
Can't sleep at night because my tinnitus keeps sending bizarre messages.
%
My Elmer once gave me some sound advice.
He said, "It's worth spending money on good speakers."
%
Going QRT after 288 QSOs is nasty --- because it's two gross.
%
An introverted Ham looks at <i>their</i> shoes when talking to you.
An extroverted Ham looks at <i>your</i> shoes.
%
Don't know the difference between whole numbers and decimal?
You are missing the point.&ensp; Just don't get irrational about it.
%
Dr. Seuss: "Sam, I Ohm."
%
The older I get, the faster I used to copy CW.
%
A little experience often upsets a lot of theory.
%
I just realized that Millennials use "LOL" the same way that CW Ops use <span STYLE="text-decoration:overline">AR</span>.
%
I know of a ham that lives in his car.
He's now ohmless.
%
My biggest fear is that, after I die, my wife will sell my radios.
Not for what they're worth, but for what I told her I paid for them.
%
Hams will literally buy a 3rd, 4th, or 5th transceiver, instead of going to therapy.
%
Curious enough to take it apart; skilled enough to put it back together.
Smart enough to hide the extra components when I'm done...
%
Grant me the serenity to accept the things that are grounded,
the courage to charge things negatively,
and the wisdom to know the potential difference.
%
Just heard a 15M CW OP calling "O-S-S, O-S-S, O-S-S..." over and over.
Dunno what that's all about.
%
I'm so old, I remember CONELRAD.
%
The Vikings would send secret messages using Norse code.
%
I definitely have the face for radio.
%
If I put in the batteries backward, will it be a flashdark?
%
Transceivers can sense fear.
Stay calm and speak into the mic using low, soothing tones.
%
If it isn't broken, I can fix it until it is.
%
I cleaned up my work bench and re-purposed some things.
For one, I created a Tomb of The Unknown Solder.
%
What in the world is electricity?
And where does it go after it passes through the amplifier?
%
Radio was an exciting new technology,
which made it possible to hear other people's voices in your home,
without using thin walls or having a mental condition.
%
When all else fails, read the instructions.
%
I'll sometimes use runes to fill out my contest log.
It's Norse Code.
%
If you cross a parrot and a centipede, you get a Walkie Talkie.
%
Scientist, "We've successfully taught a dog Morse code!"
Dog: [taps paw]&ensp;Me, "What did it say??" Scientist, "Woof!"
%
I'm in love with a girl from my Morse code course.
Not sure how she feels though, she keeps sending mixed signals.
%
A ham opened an electronic parts business -- but no resistors.
He named it "Mind Your Ohm Business".
%
I tried explaining electricity to a friend, but he was like, "Watt?"
%
My car broke down in Greenwich, England and will be repaired tomorrow.
I don't know what to do in the mean time.
%
If a ham's son misbehaves, you ground him.
%
10 to the 6th power Bicycles = 2 megacycles
%
I’m gonna open up a store that sells resistors.
I’ll call it the Ohm Depot.
%
I rarely use my K-band oscillator.
Hertz like crazy.
%
I injured myself measuring radio frequencies.
Still hertz...
%
There's a net for undertakers on 3.555 kcs.
They use morose code.
%
I was licensed so long ago that my first WAS certificate
was earned by working the original 13 colonies.
%
I often have to apologize in remorse code.
%
VHF equipment takes me by surprise with great frequency.
%
The best time to start contesting is the day you were licensed.
The second-best time is now.
%
Measure with a micrometer. Mark with chalk. Cut with an axe.
%
Cables that positively cannot be connected improperly will be.
%
My XYL hates how I always pretend we are on walkie-talkies.
Wife, "Our relationship is&ensp;over."
Me, "Our relationship is <i>what</i>? Over."
%
What's the hardest part about being a rare DX op?
Being quiet about it.
%
Just had a QSO with a rancher&thinsp;/&thinsp;ham.
"Neigh, Nicker, Snort, Stomp!"&ensp; It was Horse code.
%
My dad was an audio engineer.
He always gave me sound advice.
%
New equipment presents new QRN.
%
I bought a pair of rare headphones.
They’re a sound investment.
%
Radio equipment will be damaged in direct proportion to its value.
%
Starting next week, passwords must be entered in Morse code.
%
My tri-bander was exposed to sub-zero temperatures last night.
This morning I was greeted with a cold reception.
%
1000 pains = 1 Megahertz
%
In specifications, Murphy's Law supersedes Ohm's.
%
It was a misconfiguration of the power circuit.
The amplifier was not plugged in.
%
Cross a dog with an antenna --- and you get a Golden Receiver.
%
Microwave hams do it with great frequency.
%
If you give your contest exchange so clearly that nobody can misunderstand, somebody will.
%
I'm a ham because I was told that I have a face for radio.
%
I know lots of jokes about capacitors,
but I'd have to charge for them.
%
I'm collecting battery jokes.
They've got potential.
%
I'd really like to operate AM.
But I have trouble getting up before noon.
%
For those delicate situations there's remorse code.
%
A few of us gather each week and discuss antennas.
They are radiation therapy sessions.
%
A ham in the kitchen would be a microwave operator.
%
I think my new receiver may have fallen in love with me.
It hasn't said anything but I've been picking up a lot of signals.
%
With great power comes great current squared times resistance.
%
Two Rohn towers fell in love.
They are now on the same wavelength.
%
Two Yagis got married.
After the wedding, the reception was great!
%
At Field Day I grabbed an antenna while it was in use.
Boy! That hertz!
%
The metal strip in U.S. money is sensitive to RF.
Because it seems to always burn a hole in my pocket.
%
Can contesting be an addiction?
Depends on the frequency.
%
There's nothing to fear but fear itself.
Well, that and poor propagation and a high K Index.
%
<b>Trap</b> (N.)  Device installed in a antenna to collect rain-water.
%
At a swapfest I found: "FOR SALE TS-520 volume stuck on full"
I thought, "I can't turn that down!"
%
QRP Hams never die.
They just QSB.
%
When you come to a tee in the coax -- Take it!
%
Never answer an anonymous QSL.
%
QRP keys can also serve as tie clasps.
%
You can hear a lot by listening
%
The only two hams in the small town got along great.
They were on the same wavelength.
%
Radio amateurs do it with frequency.
%
I think I have RF on my key.
But I can't put my finger on it.
%
DIY Hams do it with less resistance.
%
Go buy a new tool, and the lost one will show up immediately.
%
Passel: The collective noun for a group of Amateur Radio Operators.
%
The Ham Operator apologized to his wife.
He used re-Morse code.
%
I would imagine that if you understood Morse code,
a tap dancer would drive you crazy.
%
Enjoying Ham Radio is not about who you know.
It's about making all the right connections.
%
The VFO in my 1st transceiver read out in Roman Numerals.
%
There are two kinds of tape, the one that won't stay on, and the one that won't come off.
%
They "bleeped" the guy on TV so many times it sounded like Morse code.
%
Adding features does not necessarily increase functionality -- it just makes the user manual thicker.
%
An Amateur Radio Operator is a device that turns coffee into <b>QSO</b>s.
%
<b>OHM:</b> It's not just a mantra; it's the LAW.
%
The village electrician's funeral was yesterday.
Everyone came in shorts.
%
Coax: Measure twice -- cut once.
%
"You think more of that ham radio than you do of me"
"Well, I get less interference from it,"
%
There was once an attempt to repeal Ohms Law.
But it met too much resistance.
%
"...so she told me it was either her or the ham radio, Over."
%
No trees were killed in the creation of this quip.
However, a great many electrons were terribly inconvenienced.
%
I guess I've been a ham for a long time now.
I still use a quill pen to fill out the log.
%
The 50-50-90 rule:
Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right,
there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.
%
When I found out that my amplifier wasn't waterproof, I was shocked.
%
Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored.
%
People are usually shocked when they find out I'm not a very good electrician.
%
Electricity is dangerous. Shocking, ain't it?
%
I caught mt son chewing on electrical cords. I had to ground him.
He's doing better currently, and now conducting himself properly.
%
After trying to get something apart for 90 minutes, you find a clip that gets the job done in 10 seconds.
%
A failed 25¢ part cannot be replaced by a new 25¢ part, but by a sub-assembly whose cost is equal to or greater than that of the device in need of the part.
%
The attention span of a transceiver is only as long as it power cord.
%
All ham shack cabling aspires to the condition of macramé.
%
Everyone is entitled to their own wrong way of doing things.
%
If you take something apart and put it back together enough times, you will now have enough leftover parts to make another one, but neither one will work.
%
If it measures good and sounds bad, it is bad.
If it measures bad and sounds good, you've measured the wrong thing.
%
Under the most carefully controlled conditions of pressure, temperature, humidity and other variables, your equipment will perform as it damn well pleases.
%
There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness." (David Berry)
%
When you get to the point where you really understand your transceiver, it's probably obsolete.
%
For every action, there is an equal and opposite malfunction.
%
Resistance is <u>not</u> futile.
It is voltage divided by current.
%
Tinnitus makes for great <b>CW</b> practice.
%
An OM never dies, they just <b>QSB</b>.
%
An OM never dies, they just <b>QSY</b>.
%
You can get farther with a kind word and a <b>KW</b> -- than you can with just a kind word.
%
Simple jobs always get put off because there will be time to do them later.
%
Assumption is the mother of all screw-ups.
%
If one views his problem closely enough, he will recognize himself as part of the problem.
%
If it's worth doing, it's worth overdoing.
%
All probabilities are 50%.
Either a thing will happen, or it won't.
%
New equipment creates new problems.
%
A hot soldering iron looks exactly the same as a cold soldering iron.
%
The component in any circuit that has the highest failure rate, will be placed in the least accessible location.
%
The time it takes to rectify a situation is inversely proportional to the time it took to do the damage.
%
You can always find what you are <i>not</i> looking for.
%
You can make it foolproof, but you can't make it damnfoolproof.
%
Nature always sides with the hidden flaw.
%
Complex problems always have simple, easy-to-understand wrong solutions.
%
Opportunity always knocks at the least opportune moment.
%
Things equal to nothing else are equal to each other.
%
If anything <i>can't</i> go wrong, it will.
%
If a series of events can go wrong, it will occur in the worst possible sequence.
%
Nothing is ever so bad that it can't get worse.
%
Hindsight is exact science.
%
If several things that could have gone wrong have <u>not</u> gone wrong,
it would've ultimately been beneficial for them to have gone wrong.
%
There is no feature so bad that some people won't love it.
%
Chasing <b>DX</b> is a contact sport.
%
The inveterate ham never makes the same mistake twice.
Five-six times, yes, But never just twice.
%
"I'm polarized."
"Are you sure?"
"I'm positive!"
%
Hams do it till it hertz.
%
If the tube tester says it's bad, it's bad.
If the tube tester says it's good, it still might be bad.
%
Why do transformers hum? They don't know the words!
%
All electronic devices are powered by white smoke. When smoke goes out, device is dead.
%
Once a new technology rolls over you, if you're not part of the steamroller, you're part of the road.
%
It's supposed to be automatic, but actually you have to push this button.
%
All this modern technology just makes people try to do everything at once.
%
We are stuck with technology when what we really want is just stuff that works.
%
Technology is a word that describes something that doesn't work yet.
%
Just because something doesn't do what you planned it to do doesn't mean it's useless.
%
Electricity is actually made up of extremely tiny particles called electrons, that you cannot see with the naked eye unless you have been drinking.
%
Electricity is really just organized lightning.
%
The wrong way always seems more reasonable.
%
The inevitable seldom happens and the unexpected constantly occurs.
%
If brute force doesn't solve your problems, then you aren't using enough.
%
Electronics is the science that deals with apparatus that are smarter than the people that use them.
%
Don't explain ham radio to a layman. Simpler to explain sex to a virgin.
%
There's more to learning than is taught in books.
%
The only perfect wisdom is hindsight.
%
The more innocuous a change seems, the further its influence will extend.
%
All warranty and guarantee clauses become void upon payment of invoice.
%
The necessity of making a significant change increases as the assembly of all the components nears completion.
%
Dimensions will always be expressed in the least usable term.
Velocity, for example, will be expressed in furlongs per fortnight squared.
%
An important operating or instruction manual will have been left at your previous residence..
%
Original drawings will be mangled by the copy machine.
%
In any given miscalculation, the fault will never be assigned if more than one person is involved.
%
Any error that can creep in, will. It will be in the direction that will do the most damage.
%
All constants are variables.
%
In any given computation, the figure that is most obviously correct will be the source of error.
%
A decimal will always be misplaced.
%
In a complex calculation, one factor from the numerator will always move into the denominator.
%
Any coax cut to length, will be too short.
%
Tolerances will accumulate uni-directionally toward maximum difficulty of assembly.
%
Identical units tested under identical conditions will not be identical in the field.
%
The availability of a component is inversely proportional to the need for that component.
%
If a project requires n components, there will be n-1 components in stock.
%
If a particular resistance is needed, that value will not be available.
Further, it cannot be developed with any available series or parallel combination.
%
A dropped tool will land where it can do the most damage.
%
A device selected at random from a group having 99.99% reliability, will be a member of the .001% group.
%
When one connects a 3-phase line, the phases will be wrong.
%
A new motor will rotate in the wrong direction.
%
The probability of a value being omitted from a schematic is directly proportional to its importance.
%
Interchangeable parts won't.
%
Probability of failure of a component, assembly, subsystem, or system, is inversely proportional to the ease of repair or replacement.
%
If a breadboard functions perfectly, subsequent production units will malfunction.
%
Components that must not and cannot be assembled improperly will be.
%
The <b>VOM</b> will be used on an overly sensitive range.
%
The <b>VOM</b> will be connected backwards.
%
A ham with one <b>VOM</b> knows the voltage.
A ham with two <b>VOM</b>s is never sure.
%
The most delicate component will be dropped.
%
Ink Jet printers will deposit more ink on people than on paper.
%
If a circuit <i>cannot</i> fail, it will.
%
A fail-safe circuit will destroy others.
%
An instantaneous power supply crowbar circuit will operate too late.
%
A transistor protected by a fast acting fuse will protect the fuse by blowing first.
%
A self-starting oscillator won't.
%
A crystal oscillator will oscillate at the wrong frequency ... if it oscillates.
%
A <b>pnp</b> transistor will be an <b>npn</b>.
%
A newly purchased rig or component will meet its specs only long enough to pass dummy load checks.
%
After the last of the 16 mounting screws has been removed from an access cover, it will be discovered that the wrong access cover has been removed.
%
After the access cover has been secured by the 16 screws, it will be discovered that the gasket has been omitted.
%
After a rig has been fully reassembled, extra components will be found on the bench.
%
Hermetic seals will leak.
%
Specified environmental conditions will always be exceeded.
%
Any safety factor set as a result of practical experience will be exceeded.
%
In an rig or device characterized by a number of plus or minus (+/-) errors, the total error will be the sum of all errors adding in the same direction.
%
In calculations, Murphy's Law will supersede Ohm's law.
%
Little Used Q-Signal:
<b>QBA</b> - My antenna is BIG!
<b>QBA?</b> - How big is your antenna?
%
Little Used Q-Signal:
<b>QBO</b>  - Don't sit next to that guy in the meeting.
<b>QBO?</b> - Buddy, can you spare some soap?
%
Little Used Q-Signal:
<b>QBS</b> - It's getting deep in here
<b>QBS?</b> - Did I tell you about the one that got away?
%
Little Used Q-Signal:
<b>QCW</b> - I am going to whistle Morse Code on FM
<b>QCW?</b> - Why are you whistling Morse?
%
Little Used Q-Signal:
<b>QHI</b> - I am jumping in quick to say hi, then going QRT
<b>QHI?</b> - Are you leaving after only one transmission?
%
Little Used Q-Signal:
<b>QKB?</b> - How many knobs does your radio have?
<b>QKB n</b> - My radio has "n" knobs
%
Little Used Q-Signal:
<b>QLF</b> - I am sending with my left foot
<b>QLF?</b> - Are you sending with your left foot?
%
Little Used Q-Signal:
<b>QOF</b> - Yes, I am an Old Fart
<b>QOF?</b> - Are you an Old Fart?
%
Little Used Q-Signal:
<b>QOK</b> - Your last transmission was Okie Dokie
<b>QOK?</b> - Was my last transmission OK?
%
Little Used Q-Signal:
<b>QRC</b> - Alert! Rag chewer on frequency!
<b>QRC?</b> - Are you a rag chewer?
%
Little Used Q-Signal:
<b>QWC</b> - I have to go to the bathroom
<b>QWC?</b> - Do you have to go to the bathroom?
%
Little Used Q-Signal:
<b>QZZ</b> - I fell asleep at the mike
<b>QZZ?</b> - Is that a 60Hz hum, or are you snoring?
%
Little Used Q-Signal:
<b>QWY?</b> - Is your QTH Wyoming? I need you for WAS!
<b>QWY</b>  - My QTH is Wyoming and I QSL 100%
%
Little Used Q-Signal:
<b>QRI?</b> - Is your QTH Rhode Island? I need you for WAS!
<b>QRI</b>  - My QTH is Rhode Island and I QSL 100%
%
All signals heard off a fixed antenna will be coming from the opposite direction.
%
Great propagation normally occurs two days prior and one day after the contest.
%
After the contest many contesters boast they weren't prepared for it.
%
A contest winner always compliments the competition, especially their antennas and equipment.
%
A <b>DX</b>er who misses a rare country invariably claims it was a country he already had.
%
When you install a new effective antenna, your amplifier will blow up.
%
Axiom of <b>QSL</b> exchange: Confirmed are only those <b>QSO</b>'s that you are not sure of.
%
As soon as you receive all the <b>QSL</b> cards for particular award, you find out that its requirements became more complex just about a week ago.
%
If you manage to send in an application for an award, you will find that it was eliminated two years ago.
%
If while tuning your antenna the <b>SWR</b> becomes 1:1, you're connected to a dummy load.
%
The best antenna you've ever had was the one blown down by the wind last week.
%
When you don't have time to send in a contest log, everyone's scores will be lower.
%
If the new antenna works better, you are connected to the old antenna.
%
Logic is a systematic method of coming to the wrong conclusion with confidence.
%
Always draw your curves, then plot your reading.
%
Nothing ever gets built on schedule or within budget.
%
All's well that ends.
%
To err is human, but to really foul things up requires technology.
%
The primary function of the design engineer is to make things difficult for the fabricator and impossible for the serviceman.
%
After all is said and done, a hell of a lot more is said than done.
%
Any circuit design must contain at least one part which is obsolete, two parts which are unobtainable and three parts which are still under development.
%
If mathematically you end up with the incorrect answer, try multiplying by the page number.
%
Any system which depends on human reliability is unreliable.
%
If you can't understand it, it is intuitively obvious.
%
The only perfect science is hind-sight.
%
Work smarder and not harder, and be careful of yor speling.
%
If a breadboard circuit works, something is wired wrong.
%
When all else fails, read the instructions manual.
%
Build a system that even a fool can use and only a fool will want to use it.
%
A project will be halted near completion by one tiny, previously insignificant detail.
%
The work remaining to finish your project increases as the deadline approaches.
%
It is never wise to let a piece of electronic equipment know that you are in a rush.
%
The screw that is in the most awkward place will always be the one with the tightest thread.
%
The new version always manages to drop the one feature you need most.
%
In today's fast-moving tech environment, it is a requirement that we forget more than we learn.
%
It is simple to make something complex, and complex to make it simple.
%
Measurements will be quoted in the least practical unit;
velocity, for example, will be measured in 'furlongs-per-fortnight'.
%
In electronics repair the part with the highest failure rate will always be located in the least accessible area of the equipment.
%
If it works in theory, it won't work in practice.
If it works in practice it won't work in theory.
%
When you finally update to a new technology, that's when everyone stops supporting it.
%
In theory there is no difference between theory and practice, but in practice there is.
%
Never attribute to Murphy's Law that which is adequately explained by idiocy.
%
Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic.
%
Hofstadter's Law: It always takes longer than you expect, even when you take into account Hofstadter's Law.
%
A <b>Ham</b> with a watch knows what time it is.
A <b>Ham</b> with two watches is never sure.
%
When a <b>Ham</b> is waiting for propagation to open up, it will occur when he has gone to the john.
%
The minute you sell something at the hamfest; you will want to use it again.
%
Your peanut-butter jar of resistors contains only two sizes: Too Large and Too Small.
%
No electronic component will work properly unless all of the smoke is kept therein.
%
Trouble strikes in series of threes. But during <b>Field Day</b>, the next problem after a series of three is not a fourth -- it's the start of a brand new series of three.
%
If it can be borrowed and it can be broken, you will borrow it and you will break it.
%
In a <b>QSO</b> circumvent prolixity and eschew obfuscation.
%
Boat Anchor Law: Established technology tends to persist in spite of new technology.
%
If you're feeling good, don't worry. You'll get over it.
%
You always find something in the last place you look.
%
In any ham shack, junk accumulates to fill the space available for its storage.
%
The deficiency will never show itself during the dummy load tests.
%
Anything you try to fix will take longer and cost more than you thought.
%
If you fool around with a thing for very long you will screw it up.
%
You can fool all of the people some of the time, and some of the people all of the time, but you can't fool the contest robot.
%
Anytime things appear to be going great, you have overlooked something.
%
Cole's Law: Thinly sliced cabbage.
%
Whenever one number or letter can change the entire accuracy of a <b>QSO</b>, the probability of an error being made will be in direct proportion to the points loss that will occur.
%
If you can reach the faulty part, you don't have the tool to remove it.
%
Spend sufficient time confirming the need and the need will disappear.
%
The first rule of intelligent tinkering is to save all the parts.
%
A $300 integrated circuit will protect a 10 cent fuse by blowing first
%
If you think the problem is bad now, just wait until "they" solve it.
%
Good judgment comes from experience.
Experience comes from bad judgment.
%
Everything put together falls apart sooner or later.
%
Sooner or later, the worst possible set of circumstances is bound to occur.
%
If you mess with something long enough, it'll break.
%
After things have gone from bad to worse, the cycle will repeat itself.
%
Once a job is fouled up, anything done to improve it only makes it worse.
%
The tire is only flat on the bottom.
%
Any piece of electronic equipment, regardless of its age or configuration, may be expected to perform at any time in a totally unexpected manner, for reasons that are either entirely obscure or else completely mysterious.
%
The new transceiver will break down as soon as the old rig is sold.
%
(2 + 2) is never equal to 5 -- not even for very large values of 2.
%
A piece of equipment goes on sale only after you have purchased it at the regular price.
%
Complex problems have simple, easy to understand wrong answers.
%
Things are more like they are now than they have ever been before.
%
The two most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity.
%
Life is what happens to you while you are making other plans.
%
A toothache tends to start on the morning of a contest.
%
Good planning randomizes outcome.
%
If a coax cable has one end, then it has another.
%
For every problem, there is a neat, simple solution; and it is wrong.
%
Inside every large problem is a small problem struggling to get out.
%
<b>QSO</b>'s come and go, but <b>QRM</b> accumulates.
%
Common sense is not that common.
%
Murphy's law was not propounded by Murphy, but by another man with the same name.
%
The legibility of a schematic is inversely proportional to its importance.
%
Radio Law of Thermodynamics: Things get worse under pressure.
%
You never run out of things that can go wrong.
%
If there is a 50/50 chance of something going wrong, nine times out of ten it will.
%
No matter where you <b>QSY</b>, there you are.
%
It is easier to get forgiveness than receive permission.
%
The fewer functions any device is required to perform, the more perfectly it can perform those functions.
%
If you keep anything long enough you can throw it away.
If you throw anything away, you will need it as soon as it is no longer available.
%
There are coexisting elements in frustration phenomena which separate expected results from achieved results.
%
The easiest way to find a lost tool or piece of equipment is to buy a replacement.
%
It works better if you plug it in.
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Laziness is the mother of nine out of ten inventions.
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Half of being smart is knowing what you're dumb at.
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The universe is not only weirder than we imagine.
It's weirder than we can imagine.
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The accessibility of small parts which fall from the work bench, varies directly with the size of the part, and inversely with its importance to the unit under repair.
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Assumption is the mother of all foul-ups.
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If a thing cannot be fitted into something smaller than itself, some dope will do it.
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Once you open a can of worms, the only way to re-can them is to use a larger can.
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Anagram: The Morse Code = Here Come Dots
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Anagram: Amateur Radio = Radiate Amour
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Anagram: Amateur Radio = Air Duet Aroma
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Old antenna designers never die; they just "Phase Array"
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Many hams are upgrading to the new walkie-talkie-textie-selfie.
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E = mc<sup>2</sup> &plusmn;3db
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The flow of electricity might cause E-motional damage.
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James Bond’s Morse Code signature is "Dah!&ensp;Dit&thinsp;Dah!"
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King Arthur's palace electrician was Sir Kit Braker.
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Radio sets are like continuously-firing automatic pistols shooting at silence.
-- Picard
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op-ti-mize [verb (trans.)] ... to modify equipment or antennas so that it fails more quickly.
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